Dilbert's "Unified Theory of Everything Financial"

Quietly hidden in Adams’ groundbreaking work is a financial formula so simple it rivals Einstein’s E=mc2. In its original form Adams’ formula was apparently so heretical and so explosive that no major house would touch it when he proposed publishing it as a one-page book. After initial rejections, he announced sadly that "if God materialized on earth and wrote the secret of the universe on one page, he wouldn’t be able to find a publisher" either.
Fortunately for America’s 95 million investors, Adams’ secret nine-point formula was finally revealed in "Dilbert and the Way of the Weasels." Notice its simple brilliance in the exact reproduction of his formula:

(found at: http://www.marketwatch.com/News/Story/Story.aspx?guid=%7BBE57F0AA-03D9-4320-BC4D-83363B6372F6%7D&siteid=myyahoo&dist=myyahoo)

Send to Printer Dilbert's "Unified Theory of Everything Financial" Quietly hidden in Adams’ groundbreaking work is a financial formula so simple it rivals Einstein’s E=mc2. In its original form Adams’ formula was apparently so heretical and so explosive that no major house would touch it when he proposed publishing it as a one-page book. After initial rejections, he announced sadly that "if God materialized on earth and wrote the secret of the universe on one page, he wouldn’t be able to find a publisher" either. Fortunately for America’s 95 million investors, Adams’ secret nine-point formula was finally revealed in "Dilbert and the Way of the Weasels." Notice its simple brilliance in the exact reproduction of his formula: (found at: http://www.marketwatch.com/News/Story/Story.aspx?guid=%7BBE57F0AA-03D9-4320-BC4D-83363B6372F6%7D&siteid=myyahoo&dist=myyahoo)
	1.	make a will 158 people
	2.	pay off my credit cards 1139 people
	3.	Get term life insurance if you have a family to support
	4.	Fund your 401k to the maximum
	5.	Fund your IRA to the maximum
	6.	Buy a house if you want to live in a house and can afford it 1 person
	7.	Put six months worth of expenses in a money-market account
	8.	Take whatever money is left over and invest 70% in a stock index fund and 30% in a bond fund through any discount broker and never touch it until retirement
	9.	If any of this confuses you, or you have something special going on (retirement, college planning, tax issues), hire a fee-based financial planner, not one who charges a percentage of your portfolio
This is a community list. You can contribute, edit, or help maintain it by adding it to your lists. Created by Josh Petersen on Nov 16, 2006.