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Citigirl's "Quirkiest goals on 43T"

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There are so many goals where you look at it and think, I really want to pick that, but I am never seriously going to do it, and I have no more room left on my 43T list, so I figure, why not put them all together in a list so i at least feel satisfied that I have acknowledged their brilliance.

Let me know if you have any good ones that I can add to the list.

1.

I want to dress up like a pirate, hijack a galleon, and board cruise ships

2.

go back in time and record my favorite old TV shows, complete with the old commercials and station identification

3.

have a secret underground lair

4.

have Sir in front of my name

5.

kill harry potter

6.

Get Elmo kicked off of Sesame Street

7.

meet up with George W. in a dark alley

8.

stop getting kicked out of catholic churches

9.

Pretend I'm Cinderella, fly like Tinkerbell, and be a little Goofy.

10.

make out with katie Couric while appearing on the Today show

11.

be able to fake a scottish accent

12.

eat a vegan person

13.

interview a vampire

14.

Acquire a Prison Tray

15.

run through a mall in tattered clothing, covered in fake blood, yelling "The zombies are coming!"

16.

never wear a hoodie

17.

Break into a maximum security prison and save my brother from the electric chair

18.

go without sleep so long that i hallucinate

19.

Be fluent in 7 languages........that way I can finally read all of my instruction manuals

20.

smoke opium in an opium den

21.

Look for opportunities to say dramatic lines like "You'll live to regret this" and "Hello, my name is Indigo Montoya, you killed my father, prepare to die."

22.

Make sure I never, ever, under ANY circumstance get a tattoo

23.

kiss in a hurricane . . .or an earthquake, or how about an apocalypse!!!

24.

concoct a plan of world domination

25.

Make the best porn movie ever

26.

Find someone who speaks Italian to teach the 295 people who want to learn Italian.

27.

Have a wedding without actually having to get married.

28.

Teach my dog Russian

29.

sharpen a pencil to such a fine point, that when i throw it, it moves faster than the speed of light and travels back in time

30.

Live in the '80s

31.

Get all my body hair removed.

32.

have midget strippers at my bachelorette party

33.

have an arch nemesis

34.

Learn how to inject caffine straight into the bloodstream

35.

Go swimming in a pool of tapioca pudding.

36.

go to a job interview and say what my name is in the style of James Bond

37.

steal a garden gnome and hold him for ransom

38.

Sword fight with bread in front of the Eiffel Tower

39.

Get a zany black sidekick

40.

not electrocute myself again this week

41.

Visit a doctor while conscious

42.

Become a dirty old man

43.

get my mojo working like a mofo

44.

Convince a stranger that I am crazy

45.

form a club for people who love to climb in trees, and arrange secret meetings (in trees)

46.

Start a bar fight wearing a medival helmet and challenging the whole crowd to a duel.

47.

throw something through my tv and have it land on the other side in "Tv land"

48.

Become master of space time and dimension ... then go to france

49.

follow a dubious religion

50.

walk 500 miles, and walk 500 more, just to be the man who walked 1000 miles.

51.

Invent a time machine, go back and invent said time machine yesterday so I have time machine right now

52.

get a masters degree: make people call me master

53.

play duck, duck, goose with a biker gang

54.

date an elf

55.

Shrink Texas.

56.

visit every state except Iowa

57.

live in a fancy neighborhood and then be the quirky neighbor with all the cats

58.

sell michigan to canada

59.

sell drugs in church

60.

stop killing hobos

61.

get a job that requires a lot of acronyms

62.

Get a parrot and teach it to talk like Yoda

63.

Become a jedi master

64.

walk down wall street wearing only a tie

65.

be marooned on a desert island

66.

dance in a full suit of armour at a nightclub

67.

go on a drunken camping trip

68.

colonize mars

69.

inscribe a secret tablet, guide to the ancient stone temple, with the words "when you approach the ancient stone temple you must be attractive and scantily clad"

70.

Pretend my house is haunted, so I can have paranormal detectives check it out and then laugh when they don't find ghosts

71.

Meet someone named Mike.

72.

Go back in time and laugh at Hitlers moustache

73.

Give the needy food they would actually like.

74.

eat a penny

75.

smoke a cigarette with bigfoot

76.

make a "Waldo" dress and have someone find me in a huge crowd

77.

Get drunk in an old Irish pub and an old Scottish pub to see which one gets me more drunk.

78.

get an attack goose

79.

Fill a bottle with water from the Pacific Ocean and empty it into the Atlantic Ocean

80.

Do some Pirate Radio ... on a Boat. With Pirates.

81.

open a "new army" across the street from an Old Navy Store and give the Old Navy manager a dirty look every morning

82.

grow a diabolical mustache

83.

blow a president in the oval office

84.

Get a master bater's degree.

85.

Meet a talking donkey that sounds like Eddie Murphey

86.

transfer my consciousness into a Fembot

87.

"receive a letter from Hogwarts apologizing for the late owl but informing me that i amactually a wizard.

88.

Besmirch someone. Then find out what besmirch means.

89.

Make a caveman fight a ninja. The caveman gets a club, the ninja gets nothing but his bare hands.

90.

Say to a bartender, "Whiskey, straight up... Leave the bottle"

91.

use my credit card to pay for a 29¢ purchase

92.

Set up a confession stand outside bars and nightclubs.

93.

knock over the leaning tower of pisa

94.

Sell Texas Back to Mexico thereby increasing the IQ of both countries.

95.

make love to Ben and Jerry

96.

survive the zombie apocalypse

97.

hijack a parade a la Ferris Bueller

98.

resurrect dinosaurs into the modern era so I can satisfy my curiosity about who would win between dinosaurs and tanks in a battle on the field of honor.

99.

Make a long list of arbitrary goals and entries about them then never complete any

100.

Stop caring what people think of me and start caring how much money they're going to give me.

101.

Start a bar fight in every state.

102.

sell texas on ebay

103.

Grow 50 feet tall and attack Japan.

104.

learn to control animals mind, set a whole of animals free, and have the tigers guard my secret base while i have the monkeys and gibbons stealgold at fort knox and then start a fake buisness as a front for my revolt of the animals to reclaim the world

105.

be in a tabloid with bigfoot

106.

scare my grandchildren with stories of my crazed past

107.

Nuke McDonald's.

108.

marry an illegal immigrant

109.

be a lounge lizard

110.

Host a 'mad' tea party; the madness shall be embraced with the help of mushroom tea.

111.

beat someone to death with a can of peas

112.

watch a movie without getting kicked out the cinema

113.

skydive in my underwear

114.

Become a "James Bond" style criminal mastermind by the time I'm 50

115.

eat a crayon and see if they are indeed “non toxic”

116.

become insane and live in my imagenary world

117.

get a priest a rabbi and a nun to walk into a bar

118.

get thrown out of a concert for running up on stage and making out with the lead singer right quick

119.

make friends with an orangutan so we can high five each other

120.

Engage in phone sex with the next Telemarketer that calls

This is Citigirl's list. Only Citigirl can edit it. You can make your own version of this list.

Created by Citigirl on Jun 20, 2007.