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Balut's "Goal Dugout"

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Benchwarmers waiting for me to put them in.

Have more interesting weeknights.

Spend the day at the arboretum and learn the names of trees.

Talk to old hippies who stayed hippies.

fly in a gulfstream

Have a backyard studio.

Stop being one of the few chumps who make it into work during snow days and ice storms.

Spill wine on the tablecloth at Martha Stewart's house.

Sell hot pretzels on the street for a day in NYC.

Shoot a rocket launcher

10.

learn to ice skate backwards

11.

Learn what makes Richard Branson tick.

12.

Eat at Salumi (Mario Batali's dad's restaurant) in Seattle.

13.

Be hypnotized on stage.

14.

make limoncello

15.

watch more documentaries

16.

Have the passeggiata (Italy's ritual community evening walk) catch on in the states.

17.

Become more knowledgeable about sushi.

18.

Drink at a famous old bar.

19.

Attend a Sacred Harp singing performance.

20.

Take an Outward Bound course

22.

Go to Mexico for Dia de Los Muertes

23.

Have a real calling and be less of a Walter Mitty.

24.

value the experiential over the material

25.

lash myself to the mast

26.

Wonder. Experience. Connect.

27.

Have freedom to travel.

28.

have a plan

29.

Document and savor my revenge fantasies.

31.

Brainstorm alternatives to self-exile.

32.

hit an out of the park home run

33.

Indulge myself at least once a month.

34.

adhere to a schedule

35.

Don't consign myself to life's dollar menu.

36.

Read a single source for more than 15 minutes at a stretch.

37.

Kill the telemarketers.

38.

Stop using the procrastination device of running unnecessary errands.

39.

Eat good meals no matter how much I have to retrench.

40.

Study art, design, fashion, and style for a couple hours a week for a year. I have some catching up to do.

41.

Cluster my passing interests.

42.

Go on an information diet.

43.

Curb my parasuicidal eating habits.

44.

Don't let friends' calls go to voicemail.

45.

Overcompensate for my avoidant tendencies.

46.

Be less pretentious

47.

Make a 72 hour plan to get out of any impasse.

48.

Protect my aging parents from exploitation.

49.

know what to do with myself

50.

Take the financial long view.

51.

Spend more time developing new skills in areas of strength than doing remedial work on areas of weakness.

52.

Require at least 15 minutes prep time for one meal at home each day.

53.

Demonstrate my worth and be compensated accordingly.

54.

Decide quickly, but thoughtfully.

55.

Take a step back if I have to.

56.

Develop skills only if I have a reasonable chance of using them.

57.

Be more neighborly

60.

Be compliant and efficient at work, but maintain an undertone of fuck-you attitude.

61.

compete

62.

Watch out for secondary gains.

63.

Only get one or two books at a time from the library

64.

Stop taking online personality and psychological screening tests.

65.

Put things back immediately after I use them

66.

Purge my wardrobe of any item I see people over 70 commonly wear.

67.

Structure my life more.

69.

Buy cool and unusual stuff.

70.

Shoot the shit with sales clerks more. They're bored out of their skulls.

71.

Have passive income

72.

reconnect

73.

Never take a job that requires me to use the back entrance.

74.

Watch all the TED talks online.

75.

Have a more civilized lifestyle.

76.

Bike on a converted railroad trail.

77.

Reflect fondly on the dumbass shit I got away with in life.

78.

learn about buddhism

79.

ditch the land line

80.

Get a regular doctor.

81.

Assert my preferences more.

82.

Stay caught up.

83.

Stop encountering people with relatives who died who share my first name and were born in the same year, It's starting to get creepy.

84.

Play against type.

85.

See what's going on in the middle of the night at a hip 24 hour coffee shop.

86.

Count the number of people at Dunkin' Donuts who brought their AA Big Book with them.

87.

Find something remunerative that sucks me in as much as surfing the net.

88.

Buy a carpet steamer.

89.

Try not to sound drunk on the phone when I'm perfectly sober.

90.

Migrate my computer files to nonproprietary formats.

91.

Spend more time on forward thinking and less time on post-mortems of my failures.

92.

Keep track of the dramatis personae in my life.

This is Balut's list. Only Balut can edit it. You can make your own version of this list.

Created by Balut on Jun 03, 2008.